Sorry, Your Card’s Been Denied

I lost myself this weekend. 

Saturday night,

Over a mind flaming with the

Thoughts

Of all the things I couldn’t have.

 I wanted to reach out into

A mythical store

And buy

Security for the future,

Contentment with what I am,

Solid happiness.

I laid in front of myself

And

Tried to buy these things,

Cheap

And

Instantly

But my credit was denied.

 

I’m glad they tore me up.

 

Everybody,

Scours the earth looking

To feel these things.

Everybody,

Breaks down to nothing.

Everybody,

Prematurely gives up hope

On their real wants

For cheap pink happiness.

 

I think my whole struggle

Was

Keeping the faith enough

To still believe

I

Am

Not

Everybody.

 

And neither are you.